Leave Room

The best travel moments I have ever had were not on any itinerary.

They happened in the unplanned moments, the ones you fall into rather than seek out. A cancelled plan that led somewhere better. A conversation with a stranger at the next table. They happened because we left room for them.

Most of us approach travel the way we approach a to-do list. There are things to see, places to eat, experiences to check off. Having a plan is how you get somewhere. But the plan is not the trip. The trip is everything that happens around it.

I have been lucky enough to travel often with my daughter Gabby. We do not need a tight schedule to have a good time. We need a general direction and an open hand. Some of our best moments have come from exactly that.

On a trip to Bodega Bay and Point Reyes in the summer of 2018, we went specifically to see the Potter Schoolhouse, the filming location from Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds. We found it. It was quietly creepy in exactly the right way. But the thing that stayed with us came from a tip at the visitor center. The UC Davis Bodega Marine Laboratory offered free Friday afternoon tours and we had no idea it existed until that moment. Three hours later we were still there, working our way through everything there was to see.

The same trip took us to Petaluma to meet up with an old friend who happened to be away that weekend. The detour could have felt like a waste. Instead we wandered until we found Brewsters Beer Garden on Water Street, right along the Petaluma River. It felt less like a bar and more like a party in someone's big backyard, families at picnic tables, kids playing, live music, the kind of place you happen upon and immediately feel at home. We had a soft pretzel and a beignet and were in no hurry to leave. Dinner one night at Bodega Bay put us next to a couple we had never met. Somehow the conversation found its way to where we were all from, and the man mentioned a small town in upstate New York. It was the same town where my father grew up. Of all the places to sit down for dinner on the Northern California coast. That kind of thing does not happen if you eat in your hotel room.

When you stay in a hostel, the unexpected comes with the territory. On one trip a bunkmate from Canada mentioned she was driving solo through Mexico to a friend's wedding. I had never considered doing something like that. The conversation did not change my plans but it reminded me how many different ways there are to travel.

Even in a city as familiar as San Francisco, leaving room pays off. On a trip there with one of our summer exchange students from France, her cousins were visiting the city at the same time. While we were waiting for a cable car, a limo pulled up and offered all of us a ride to Fisherman's Wharf for about the same price per person. We said yes. On the way back, instead of waiting in a long line, another limo appeared. We took that one too. It was hard not to wonder what people on the street thought of us pulling up in a limo. Probably nothing. But it was fun to imagine. Did we miss out on the cable car experience that every visitor to San Francisco is supposed to have? Maybe. But nobody complained. There is a version of travel that is about getting through the itinerary. Seeing what you are supposed to see, eating where you are supposed to eat, taking the photos that prove you were there. And then there is another version that is less about covering ground and more about being open to whatever comes across your path. Getting off the path entirely sometimes. Leaving enough room in your days that you can veer without feeling rushed to the next excursion or tourist attraction. Ask a local where they actually go and what they think you should not miss. You might be surprised. Some of the best travel days I have had were ones where someone else pointed the way.

It is sitting at the beach long enough to just take in the local vibe, watching the surfers, the people walking by, the general unhurried energy of a place like Ocean Beach. Wandering into a farmer's market on a Wednesday evening and discovering a drum circle has started up at the water's edge, people dancing for no particular reason other than that the music is good and the evening is warm. Following a side road because something caught your eye. Letting a plan fall apart and seeing what shows up instead.

Red Compass was built on the understanding that travel at its best is not transactional. It is immersive, personal, and full of the kinds of moments that stay with you long after you have come home. When everything behind the scenes is handled with precision and care, you are free to simply take in what is around you. Being fully present opens you to everything a place has to offer, even the things you did not know to look for.

Leave room. The best moments have a way of finding you when you stop filling every hour.